weary as water

every time i blink i have a tiny dream

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we who are your closest friends

September 5, 2014 by lacinda Leave a Comment

we who are
your closest friends
feel the time
has come to tell you
that every Thursday
we have been meeting
as a group
to devise ways
to keep you
in perpetual uncertainty
frustration
discontent and
torture
by neither loving you
as much as you want
nor cutting you adrift

your analyst is
in on it
plus your boyfriend
and your ex-husband
and we have pledged
to disappoint you
as long as you need us

in announcing our
association
we realize we have
placed in your hands
a possible antidote
against uncertainty
indeed against ourselves
but since our Thursday nights
have brought us
to a community of purpose
rare in itself
with you as
the natural center
we feel hopeful you
will continue to make
unreasonable
demands for affection
if not as a consequence
of your
disastrous personality

then for the good of the collective

We Who Are Your Closest Friends
by Phillip Lopate

Filed Under: daily, poetry

Kindness

November 10, 2013 by lacinda Leave a Comment

By Naomi Shihab Nye

Before you know what kindness really is
you must lose things, feel the future dissolve in a moment
like salt in a weakened broth.
What you held in your hand,
what you counted and carefully saved,
all this must go so you know
how desolate the landscape can be
between the regions of kindness.
How you ride and ride
thinking the bus will never stop,
the passengers eating maize and chicken
will stare out the window forever.

Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness,
you must travel where the
Indian in a white poncho lies dead
by the side of the road.
You must see how this could be you,
how he too was someone who journeyed through the night
with plans and the simple breath
that kept him alive.

Before you know kindness
as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow
as the other deepest thing.
You must wake up with sorrow.
You must speak to it till your voice
catches the thread of all sorrows
and you see the size of the cloth.
Then it is only kindness
that makes sense anymore,
only kindness that ties your shoes
and sends you out into the day
to mail letters and purchase bread,
only kindness that raises its head
from the crowd of the world to say
it is I you have been looking for,
and then goes with you every where
like a shadow or a friend.

Filed Under: daily, poetry

Thank You

November 1, 2013 by lacinda Leave a Comment

by W. S. Merwin
Listen
with the night falling we are saying thank you
we are stopping on the bridges to bow from the railings
we are running out of the glass rooms
with our mouths full of food to look at the sky
and say thank you
we are standing by the water thanking it
smiling by the windows looking out
in our directions

back from a series of hospitals back from a mugging
after funerals we are saying thank you
after the news of the dead
whether or not we knew them we are saying thank you

over telephones we are saying thank you
in doorways and in the backs of cars and in elevators
remembering wars and the police at the door
and the beatings on stairs we are saying thank you
in the banks we are saying thank you
in the faces of the officials and the rich
and of all who will never change
we go on saying thank you thank you

with the animals dying around us
our lost feelings we are saying thank you
with the forests falling faster than the minutes
of our lives we are saying thank you
with the words going out like cells of a brain
with the cities growing over us
we are saying thank you faster and faster
with nobody listening we are saying thank you
we are saying thank you and waving
dark though it is

Filed Under: daily, poetry

(a pause)

June 16, 2013 by zag Leave a Comment

Hey there.

I have decided not to continue with my thru hike. The decision was practically made for me with the realization that if I went back to the trail immediately after finishing physical therapy* in early July, and continued hiking an average of 12-15 miles per day (probably slower in the beginning as my tendinitis is STILL killing me, after almost a month of rest), I still wouldn’t make it to Maine until mid-November (and that doesn’t allow for any zero days).

* I ended up having a severely inflamed IT band, along with patellor tendinitis and a ruptured bakers cyst.. Oh, and Lyme Disease (which I’m taking medication for). So the good news is – no knee surgery. The bad news is – still in pain.

I did have several options available to me:

  • I could flip flop (go to Maine and start hiking southbound), which is something I’ve been resistant to from the very beginning. I have in my mind that Katahdin is my end point, and it just doesn’t seem as fulfilling to think about jumping ahead & ending my hike in Virginia. I think it would be really hard to complete a thru hike this way. (No offense to those who are flipflopping, though! Hike your own hike!).
  • I could hike north, knowing I would not be able to finish before Katahdin closed.
Both of those options seemed less than stellar. It seemed obvious that my thru hike has turned into one really long section hike (751.7 miles for the first section), with many shorter sections to come. This was my one shot a thru hike, and it didn’t work out. But the goal of wanting to hike the entire Appalachian Trail still remains.
Once I made the decision that I would complete this goal as a series of section hikes, I thought about whether I wanted to go back out on the trail and continue to hike north this summer. The answer was a pretty definitive NO – it is getting miserably hot out there, and it seems that one of the biggest advantages to a section hike is that you don’t have to hike when it’s blazing hot outside.
So we’ll see how it goes. I’ll keep posting updates here (hopefully blogging will still be a ‘thing’ by the time I make it to Maine).
Thanks to everyone for your support. I am incredibly grateful to have had this experience, and I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished so far. (I mean really, I don’t even like to DRIVE 750 miles!). I wish nothing but the best to my trail family – the friends I’ve made while hiking, the trail angels, as well as everyone who read my blog and sent me notes of encouragement. If you want to follow my ‘real’ account on twitter, please do so @tinydream. Also, OWL is still out there (well, right now she’s on vacation but she’ll return soon enough) – so check out her blog as she continues on her journey.

Filed Under: appalachian trail, daily Tagged With: decisions

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random quote

Those who failed to oppose me, who readily agreed with me, accepted all my views, and yielded easily to my opinions, were those who did me the most injury, and were my worst enemies, because, by surrendering to me so easily, they encouraged me to go too far... I was then too powerful for any man, except myself, to injure me.
Napoleon Bonaparte, emperor of France 1769-1821